While there is a lot of great advice out there on how to raise kids, every kid is different. So it is important to be aware of your own kids’ individual needs when you are raising them. Being aware of your kids’ element(s) and requirements will make life easier for you and for them.

Here are 6 tips for raising each element. Chores, bedtime routines, and homework time can be approached with these tips in mind.


  1. They require a flexible and varied routine.
  2. Don’t expect them to be too organized.
  3. Listen to their ideas and encourage the best ones.
  4. They like to have friends over and see other people.
  5. They enjoy lots of variety in their activities.
  6. Turn chores and bed time into a game.


  1. They don’t like to be told what to do, instead ask for their help in accomplishing things.
  2. They are goal oriented, so offer rewards and praise for good behaviour.
  3. They will cut corners and use their charm to get away with things – teach them how to be smart about it.
  4. Recognize their strengths and praise them often – that will have a regenerative effect on them.
  5. The best way to get them to sleep is by letting them play hard and long.
  6. They love challenges and speed.


  1. They need to communicate at a deep level, so make yourself totally present for them and look deep into their eyes.
  2. They are highly sensitive children – they need reassurance.
  3. Tell them how much they mean to you and how much you love them, and also receive their signs of affection.
  4. Let them be in touch with their feelings and teach them that different people express their love and emotions differently.
  5. Help them find an outlet where they can express their emotions – consider arts, a diary or a blog.
  6. Create a wonderland or fantasy world for them.


  1. They can navigate in high and low stimulus environments, but might require some quiet time especially after an intense day.
  2. Do not rush them – they like to take their time, so give them plenty of time. If you can’t, explain to them clearly why they need to rush.
  3. They will love to snuggle and have quiet talks – quality time is important to them.
  4. Make sure their furniture and clothes are cozy and comfortable.
  5. Build them a nest or let them build theirs.
  6. Be soft and gentle with them.


  1. Explain to them clearly what they have to do and what steps are required.
  2. They get easily over stimulated, so before a big outing or event make sure they understand what they are expected to do and what is going to happen. Make sure that they get to regenerate before and after.
  3. Avoid intensity with them. If most times are low-intensity, they will be more regenerated during real emergencies.
  4. Allow them to have their own private or hiding space. If space is limited, a big cardboard box will often do. Anywhere they can be alone and where their privacy is respected.
  5. They might not talk much at family meetings or at school, so follow up with one-on-one talks in a low stimulus setting. Ask them questions and give them time to come up with an answer.
  6. Put things into context for them, especially intense moments or conflicts. Explain them what factors influenced the conflict, such as stress and anxiety, etc. and point out the constants such as the fact that you love them or that everyone is doing their best.



  1. They thrive with structure and routine.
  2. Explain things to them calmly, clearly, and logically.
  3. Allow them to be logical and direct, and to be less emotionally expressive.
  4. You can teach them about other people’s emotions and how to be diplomatic if you do so in a logical manner.
  5. Give them things to think about i.e. books, movies, games of logic.
  6. Respect their privacy and personal space. Allow them to disconnect from their surroundings.

Did we miss something? Let us know in the comments what has worked for your kids!

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